Mormon dating made easy
I was married to a non-member, and when I started thinking about dating again, I figured I would date both members and non-members. I was crazy for this guy and he was crazy for me, but he just could not wrap his mind around two adults being in love and not having sex. I had been sexually active, and now I was just going to stop? After the frenzy died down, there were 2 or 3 men that I continued to IM and email, but where it got interesting is about every week or so I would get a new “hit”–someone would just pop in with an IM and start flirting with me. When i would look at their profiles I would find that the majority of these guys were KIDS. ” What I quickly learned is the reason older chicks are “cool” is because many of us are divorced which means we were previously sexually active, and quite possibly more open to being sexually active now and teaching a few things to the youngsters. My conclusion is, for the most part, that the LDS dating sites are cyber singles bars where men (women, too, I am sure) can easily hide the big ole skeletons in their closet behind pretending to be a faithful (notice I didnt say perfect) member of the church. I mean KIDS: age range from 21(hello horny RM) to 26. One of the kids actually told me “everything, but . .” was OK, and you would be worthy to keep your temple recommend. One young man was looking for a more geographically convenient hookup. So, what can single (or divorced) adults of a certain age do if they want to keep the law of chastity while dating? What are your experiences with Mormon dating sites? Have any of you experienced the “Reverse Cougar” described above (young Mormon male seeks experienced hot older female)? When you’re dating your commitment to a person lasts for the duration of the date, and as soon as you’ve both gone your separate ways at the doorstep, that commitment is void until plans for a future date have been made.
Which in turn keeps the guy from asking out any other girl for fear that by doing so his simple invitation to get ice cream will be misinterpreted as a marriage proposal. Now this is the phase where the dating game becomes broken, because it is so easily misunderstood…or forgotten altogether.
Its a vicious cycle that can be easily avoided by understanding the 5 Stages of Dating. Dating is the stage where you review your list of “potentials” that you made from the hangout phase and you go with one person off that list to breakfast in the morning and then perhaps, you accompany a different “potential” out to dinner the next night.
Some may call that being a “player”, a term that has such a negative connotation to it; defining someone as callous and insensitive to the feelings of others, and purely in the dating game for their own selfish purposes.
But, if you think about it, aren’t we all in the dating game for “selfish” purposes.
The ultimate goal is to find someone to call our own, right?